BOOK: Come to the Quiet

Come to the Quiet. Jim & Sally Hohnberger are quite the people. So are Tati & Dina. I just finished reading Come to the Quiet, which was written by Jim & Sally and given to us by Tati and Dina, and read by Charissa and then, as you may well remember, me.

Come to the quiet. Be simple. Work hard. Rest well. Play enough. Eat right. Listen to God. Talk to God. Have time for what matters. Pack light. But there's no way to avoid problems...

At one point during a protracted battle with a forest fire around their property, a fire crew sat and watched the Hohnbergers trying to save their home. The following quote starts with Mike, one of the crew chiefs, giving a speech that night in camp. Later, the Hohnbergers gave smoothies to the firefighters who were in the area, but the crew that had sat around didn't want to accept them. But that wasn't right, so the Hohnbergers made sure ALL the firefighters got cups of fruity, refreshing brrrness.

"When we watch a family fighting the fire and do not come to their aid, we have lost the total essence of what it means to be a firefighter. This has happened once. It must never happen again."

If you could sit tonight in heaven's fire camp and listen as Christ talked about the events of the day, what would He say? What stories would He tell of your area of responsibility? Did you see the ones in trouble today, the ones just barely hanging in amid the fire of sin, of immorality, of worldly influences, and of discouragement? Or did you only see the children in your family as the same boys and girls you see everyday and never really see the struggle of their lives? Did you see that person you married as an individual in need or only as your spouse and take them and their love for granted? Every one of us have people depending upon us. Are we being faithful to that trust? If not, don't hide off in the woods feeling bad abour your failure. Come forward, accept their forgiveness, and through the strength of Christ, determine that in the hour of danger you will never be found wanting again. (p. 185)

As we come to the quiet, let's keep our eyes open. If my pack is light, I'll be able to help carry someone else's.

PERSONAL: Sisters & Daughters

It doesn't matter how you try to analyze the situation from this side of the event. To understand me, you have to be right in it. I woke up with a shooting pain in my neck at 2:45a.m. Nausea swallowed me. This was a few weeks after my initial neck pain (subluxations and pinched nerves at C3 and C4), and I wasn't in the mood for more. I woke Charissa up and told her I needed help. While getting dressed I started to shake, not like shivering, but full-on spasms. This was new. This was not desirable.

We headed for a taxi in the rain, but Charissa remembered that she needed something and ran back to the apartment leaving me holding the umbrella. I prayed I wouldn't pass out because I didn't know how she'd get me to the hospital. She got back and we waved a taxi.

By the time we got to the hospital around 3:30a.m., my tremors had mostly stopped, but nausea and pain were still real. The only thing they could do for me at that point was to try accupuncture for my nausea. But instead of improving, I thought I was going to, I wanted to, die.
My heart started racing, my blood pressure dropped to 80/50, I went numb from my elbows to my fingers and from my knees to my toes. I was hunched over ready to dry heave and then my legs and arms cramped up like I'd been riding The Black Stallion bareback (remember that scene when they have to cut the horse's mane to get him off? or was that a different movie?). I looked like the adventurous people you see steering mechanized wheelchairs with their teeth, only there wasn't any adventure in me. I was pretty much out of it.

Call it shock, a panic attack, or nervous system disruptions--I was hurting, confused, and scared. And in the bewilderment and pain, I couldn't communicate with my doctor very well. My body was totally out of control, and I had no tools to deal with it.

I felt like I was dying (part of the panic attack aspect maybe, but intellectualizing it now destracts from the moment), and I was just praying to God for forgiveness for my selfish, sinful life. Just praying that He would take me home.

But mostly praying that He would bring my sister home. "Bring her home, God. Just bring her home," I kept repeating in my head.

That was all I could think about.

Well 8 hours later they let me out of the ER, and I went home with no answers. Later an X-ray and an MRI would show there was nothing major wrong, just one slightly bulging disc, so we still don't know for sure what the pain was the woke me up. This happened twice more. Once with no tremors when I stayed home, and once when tremors started again and I spent another 2 hours in the ER. (Sidenote: the 2 hours in ER cost me about $15 U.S. dollars, exactly half of what my friend spent on lamb chops that night at a good-bye party I had planned to attend.)

I used to work as a janitor for a lady named Donna T. She was the nicest lady. She really cared about the people who worked for her. She used to pray for her daughters, that they would love Jesus and follow Him. Donna died a few years after I moved away, and I wonder how her daughters are now. I never met them, but I pray for them when I think about them. I think she'd like people to keep praying for her daughters since she can't anymore. Maybe you can pray for them also. "Jesus, do everything you can to bring them home."

Sisters and daughters--heaven needs to be full of them.

We'll take nothing to heaven except the friends we make now, so for that trip let's just pray and pack light.



(The rest of the story: Later at home after my first ER visit, I flipped open my Bible. My eyes rested on Psalm 118:5-6. "In my anguish I cried to the LORD, and he answered by setting me free. The LORD is with me; I will not be afraid.")

PERSONAL: Strength & Weakness

To make something stronger, make it weaker. To make something weak, first make it strong.

I've heard it put other ways in Taoist writings, but that's my basic idea tonight. I thought about that when I was reading Genghis Khan and the Making of the Modern World by Jack Weatherford. The Mongols were the minority, but they were able to rule the largest empire in Earth's history through wisdom. They made their opponents feel strong, then the enemies would make predictable mistakes, and the Mongols would then wipe them out.

I feel like God has been wiping me out to make me stronger. He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes (cleans) so that it will be even more fruitful. (John 15:2) He prunes us so we can be more fruitful for Him. Cuts us down so in weakness we can be strong for Him.

My life is basically pruned down to the minimum right now. I hope some fruit will be forthcoming. Almost 2 months of neck problems have pretty much shut down the normal parts of my life. It's for a reason. It's for a reason.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. (Romans 8:28)

If you need motivation to pack light, first carry a heavy load.

PERSONAL: Teens Teens Revolution (TTR)

We have finally worn hanboks (just in case you were wondering). This weekend my Sabbath afternoon teen group had a one-year anniversary party for Charissa and me. I've had a really good year hanging out with the group. They've heard a lot of my stories, and I've told them a lot of my stories.

They dressed us up in the hanboks, traditional Korean attire, and the teens entertained us with a congratulatory home movie, a group song, a special piano piece, a huge plate of dukk and roses, and a trip to Pizza Hut (another ancient tradition).

It was cool. Very special.

We took several of our photo albums from the year. It's hard to pack light when you have a photography addiction.

STUFF: Chick Dream, 365 and More...

It takes us roughly 365 days to circle the sun. This means that if someone had given Charissa and I a high-five while levitating just off the Earth's surface on the day we landed in Korea, and if said person had been able to survive for one full year right there in that very place while we had our various adventures, we would be able to give that amazing person two more high-fives today!

Yes, you got it. We've been in Korea for one solar year. To celebrate, we will be waiting at the post office for all of your gifts to arrive.

I mentioned that we've had some "various adventures." One of them involved a children's clothing store. No one was arrested. We stopped to look at the roadside pajama rack to see if we could find anything of interest for friends back home (no, we are not needing any baby clothes in this home).

We found a really cute (yes, I, Jeff Boyd, said really cute) little sporty outfit for someone about 1/4 my size. A big Donald Duck logo is on the front of the tank-top and the shorts. The back of the tank-top has a bunch of Donald Duck faces. Maybe you've seen those posters/stickers that have facial expressions labeled with different emotions. Well, the back of the tank-top has 13 different wild duck faces with 13 different descriptions. These include: LSD, Ecstacy, Cocaine, Meth, and Heroin. Does it get any cuter than that!

Charissa had a dream the other night. She was in a crowd of people, and she noticed they were having a lot of fun. Then she saw that they had really cute little yellow fluffy chicks in their mouths. They didn't eat them; they just held them in their mouths for fun. Sometimes the li'l chicks would poke their heads out of the people's mouths and say "Cheep, cheep!"

She thought it looked fun, so she put a little chick in her mouth too. Then everyone around her started dropping dead from the bird-flu and she just knew she would get it because she felt its little feet scratching the inside of her mouth. She was sure she was a goner.

The next day we read that Romania and North Korea have cases of bird flu.

With a deflated tone of voice, "I'm thinking of becoming a vegetarian. Sigh."

It's been a wild year. The one ahead doesn't look like it will be any calmer. So keep the faith and keep the peace in the year that is to be.

We're thinking about taking a vacation in the U.S. If we do, we'll try to pack light.

With love. -Us

HEALTH: Yoga

With all of my nek and bak trouble, I've been contemplating yoga. I mean, I've dabbled with the thing, but maybe it's time to get serious, get consistent, get un-robocop stiff. My Oriental doctor said no. My chiropractor said no. My neurologist said yes. My masseuse said yes. What's a guy to do?

Eddie George does yoga. He's right there on the cover of Real Men Do Yoga.

You can do some reading at:

-www.allclimbing.com/archive/2005/04/the-benefit-of-yoga/
-www.beauty-fitness-yoga-source.com/yoga-for-beginner.html
-www.yogajournal.com/
-www.yoga.com/
-www.yogabasics.com/

You know, yoga doesn't require a lot of gear, so it's easy to pack light.

SERMON: Experiencing Jesus

"Experiencing Jesus, having a relationship with him. Would you be willing to give a sermon about that next term?" Isaac asked me a few months ago. I had only preached once before in my year here, so I was a little nervous about accepting. But that very topic had been on my mind so I agreed.

Well, Friday night I shared my thoughts and story at our language institute's weekend meeting. Charissa is really the one who organized the sermon. It wouldn't have happened without her suggestions. Here's what was said:

It Takes Two to Tango
October 14, 2005

So I like to tell the story of this one man. He had a pretty normal job and pretty normal parents. His family was poor, so he always had to work really hard. Well, as he grew up he had a dream, a big dream. It was his passion, his mission. But it was too big for him to do alone, so he got a bunch of friends to help him out. So they trained and worked and were spreading their plan, their dream.

But not that many people thought he was very meaningful. His ideas ended up not being very popular politically, so after just a few years, he was arrested. Most of the people turned against him. In fact, the government even killed him, and his few friends took off. They totally deserted him.

But I think he’s the coolest guy in the world. That’s crazy, isn’t it? He doesn’t sound respectable, important or successful. But this guy is Jesus.

If Jesus’ story sounds crazy to you, well, you’re not alone. His closest friends thought it was an unbelievable story too. Jesus was killed on Friday. After the women saw the empty grave on Sunday morning and talked to the angels, they ran back to tell their friends. But listen to this:
It was Mary Magdalene, Joanna, Mary the mother of James, and the others with them who told this to the apostles. But they did not believe the women, because their words seemed to them like nonsense. (Luke 24:10-11)

Nonsense. Craziness.

These people had run away from Jesus. There were hiding in their homes with fear, and they thought the story of Jesus rising from the grave was nonsense. How in the world did they change and take the message of Jesus to the entire world? Most of them suffered cruel deaths while sharing the truth about Jesus. They weren’t scared anymore. They were moved by love.

What changed? What happened? They experienced Jesus.

Nothing less than a full-on experience of Jesus can account for their passion and love. For 40 days Jesus revealed himself to his old friends. He ate with them. He let them touch his scars. He cooked for them. He showed them that He still loved them even though they had deserted Him in His darkest hour. Those 40 days changed those men and women into fearless yet humble, bold yet loving, missionaries. They were ready to change the world once the Holy Spirit gave them power.

So here’s my question for tonight: How can we experience Jesus? We don’t have either the 3 years or the 40 days with Jesus. We can’t touch him or directly ask him questions. His story sounds crazy until we experience Him… so how can we experience Jesus?

I believe that we experience Jesus to the degree that we have a relationship with Him. So let’s look at having a relationship with Jesus.

It takes two to tango. Do you know this idiom? A person can’t dance the tango alone. Every relationship has 2 sides—husband/wife, parent/child, Jesus/us.

First, let’s look at Jesus’ side, God’s side, of the relationship.

First, we have to know that Jesus wants to be with us.
We love Him because he first loved us. 1 John 4:19
While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8

This is a picture of the world’s most expensive production car. It’s a Saleen S7. It would cost you over 670,000,000 Korean won even without import taxes! You would REALLY have to want that Saleen in order to buy it. If you’re going to pay that much for something, you must REALLY want it.

And that’s how we know how valuable we are to God, to Jesus. We can see how much He was willing to pay, to give, to give up, in order to pay the price of our sins by dying for us. And check this out, He wasn’t even guaranteed to get what he paid for! He just bought us the option to love Him back. He gave up everything just to give us the ability to choose Him or to go our own way. That’s a kind of love that I can’t even understand. That’s how badly he wants to be in a relationship with each of us. He is dying to tango.

In our search to know Jesus, to have a relationship with Him, to experience Him, we have to know that He has already started. He loved us first. He wants us to be in a relationship with Him where we can experience him. That’s the big picture, the big thing He’s done for each of us.
But let me quickly share two smaller, more personal things that show me that Jesus is interested in me, Jeff Boyd.

Story 1: I woke up on the living room floor. I looked around and saw some of my best friends still sleeping around me. Suddenly it hit me: TODAY I’M GETTING MARRIED.My heart started pounding harder than I’ve ever felt it, like it would explode. My Bible was on the floor right in front of me and I just flipped it open. My eyes fell immediately on Proverbs 18:22. 22 He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD. I said a quick prayer of thanks, and my heart rate slowed back down. I didn’t remember reading that verse before. Jesus knew my situation and showed me exactly what I needed in that moment.

Story 2: Last week I had a similar situation. Some of you know that I’ve been having neck problems for about a month now. Well, honestly, when I got home after 8 hours in the emergency room I was hurting, scared and confused. I was praying to God and asking Him for help. Again I opened the Bible randomly and glanced down the page. Here’s what I read: In my anguish I cried to the LORD, and he answered by setting me free. 6 The LORD is with me; I will not be afraid. Psalm 118:5, 6

Now I don’t suggest studying the Bible this randomly. We need structured, organized study. But these two times Jesus chose to share a special word with me when I really needed it. It’s a small way he showed his love for me. It’s how he showed that he’s active in this relationship.

OK, one more verse about Jesus’ side of the relationship, about him wanting to be with us. He’s knocking. Revelation 3:20
“Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me.”

What does Jesus want from us? He wants us to open up to Him. He wants to eat with us. He wants to hang out with us. God has done so much more, but our time is short.

So what’s my reaction to His love, His knock? That’s the other half. Because remember, it takes 2 to tango.

A relationship can’t be one-sided. During my last year of college, my dad had been telling me that I needed to meet a certain girl. He played in the school band with her, and he said she was really nice, friendly, and smart. I didn’t know who she was, and I wasn’t looking for a relationship, so I never tried to meet her or get to know her. Dad could tell me about the young lady, but his words didn’t mean a lot to me. We had to meet before I would care. And in April of 1998 I did finally meet Charissa.

And the similar thing with God is that it’s great to come to FNF and Student Church to hear people talk about God. But if that’s as far as your connection to God goes, you’ll only spend your life hearing about God but maybe never experiencing him. It’s not enough to hear other people talk, you have to get to know Jesus for yourself just like I had to get to know Charissa for myself.

We were only around each other for about 3 weeks before I graduated and went on a two-year trip around the U.S. We had a good time during those few weeks. One night we went to a bookstore and read children’s books together. We had worship together once with a bunch of friends. We helped Angela move her stuff into a friend’s basement. You know, these were just little things, but we did them together, and I got to know her a little.

OK, but that was only 3 weeks. That’s not enough time for a relationship to grow. I left and we didn’t talk for a few months. Did our relationship grow then? No. We didn’t have any communication.

Well, after several months we started e-mailing each other. It takes 2 to tango, right? She would write me e-mail messages, but it was my job to read them. I couldn’t see her or talk to her, but I could read the letters she sent me. If I would have ignored her letters, our friendship would not have grown. But I did read them. And she read mine. In fact, I later found out she had printed my e-mails and kept them in a binder.

The parallel: God has sent us a letter. The Bible. He shares his heart with us in it. But we’re never going to get to know His heart if we don’t read his letter. If I want to know God for myself, I have to read the letter he wrote to me.

And I can write to him also. One of the best ways for me personally to pray is by writing.
I have a prayer journal, and when I take the time to regularly write to God about life, that’s when I feel the closest to him and experience him the most in my life. Maybe it will work for you also. Try writing letters to Jesus, and reading His to you.

Well, a year later Charissa and I met for one day in Michigan. We had a good time talking and walking and eating and hanging out with her friends. Talking. Talk to God. I actually like talking to God while I’m walking. When I sit at home, I often get distracted or start thinking about other things. But for some reason, when I pray while walking I stay focused better.

Try talking out loud to God. I have a friend who says he prayed for the first time a couple years ago. He wrote to me and said something like, “Well, I finally tried it. I can’t explain it, but it works.” Prayer doesn’t make sense until we experience it. It’s something we just have to do.

After that day in Michigan, Charissa and I didn’t see each other again for a year. That changed when she got a job at the same institute as me in Gimhae, South Korea. After awhile we started going on some dates by ourselves away from our group of friends. For our friendship and relationship to grow, it had to be special between the two of us. And as things developed, time alone was important for us.

And I’m telling you with all my heart that the only way to build a true bond with Jesus is to be alone with him. It’s not about pastors. It’s not about missionary teachers. It’s not about other family members. Each one of us has to meet Jesus alone. We have to make alone time to be with Him, to invite him into our rooms as we talk to him and ask him to talk to us through His love letter, the Bible. If you want to experience Jesus, you’re going to have to be alone with him where no one else matters.

There’s a strong verse in the Bible: You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. 14 I will be found by you," declares the LORD. Jeremiah 29:13

Why does God require so much of me? Especially when Jesus said he’s standing right at the door of our hearts, of our lives? Well, he is at the door. He’s ready to eat with us anytime. He’s so eager. But if we are to find the deep relationship with him that he wants, we’re going to have to give it everything we have.

Think about Charissa and me again. We were seeing each other more and more. As we decided whether or not to get married, would Charissa have been interested if I’d said this: “Charissa, you’re really great. I love you with 75% of my heart and this other girl with 25% of my heart.”
No way. That doesn’t work in marriage, and it doesn’t work with Jesus. Because the kind of relationship he wants with us is the closeness that exists in marriage. He isn’t interested in superficiality. He wants us to truly know and experience him, but it has to be mutual. It takes 2 to tango.

So eventually Charissa and I got married. When a man and woman commit themselves to a relationship where they can fully experience each other, they cement that commitment with marriage, with a wedding ceremony. And when we fully commit ourselves to a living relationship with Jesus, we have a baptism ceremony.

And just like Charissa and I need to keep spending time together, we need to keep alone time with Jesus for us to continue experiencing him in close relationship. I think coming to church is like a date. It’s important, but it’s not enough. If Charissa and I had one date every week but didn’t see each other besides that, we would both be pretty disappointed and empty in this marriage. We want daily interaction.

It’s the same with God. We can’t stay close by seeing each other just once a week. Church is simply not enough for a true relationship with Jesus to grow. We need Jesus everyday, every morning. And Jesus craves to spend each day with you. People’s stories about Jesus can just sound crazy until we experience Jesus for ourselves. But to deeply experience Jesus, we have to commit ourselves to a relationship with him.

He died just to give us the chance to choose Him. And I pray that each one of us will make his sacrifice on the cross worth it by choosing to spend time getting to know him the Living Jesus, to experience Him in a committed relationship.

He’s ready, but it takes two to tango.

PERSONAL: Foundation Day

Happy Foundation Day.

October 3rd isn't just any ol' foundational type day like August 11 or December 19.

Read and learn:

"This day marks the traditional founding of Korea by Tan-gun in 2333 B.C. According to legend, the god-king, 'Tan-gun' founded the Choson Kingdom in 2333 B.C. This day fills citizens with nationalistic pride over the 4,000+ year history of Korea. " http://www.kidlink.org/KIDPROJ/MCC/mcc0943.html Incidentally, tangun is also the Korean word for carrot.

This day also marks the verified founding of Jeff & Charissa in 2000 A.D. According to fact, the non-god-king, "Jeff" asked "Charissa" to be his girlfriend. After a positive answer, they watched "Life is Beautiful." Roberto Benigni co-wrote and directed this 1997 comedy/tragedy that, as far as I can remember, mentions neither South Korea nor carrots.

It's been a wild ride, full of unexpected tragedies, comedies, and carrots. Buddha is right, life is suffering. Benigni is also right, life is beautiful.

Charissa won't let me carry the movied "Life is Beautiful." "It's too heavy," she says. I hurt my neck recently, so I don't have any choice but to pack light.